How to STOP comparing yourself

Successful people, no matter what area of their lives they succeed in, have something in common: They focus on their own progress instead of other people’s. In the age of Social Media it has become increasingly difficult to not be blinded and intimated by seemingly perfect love lives, flawless bodies, loaded bank accounts. Feeling less than? Here is what to do instead:

Don’t disrespect your future self

If you are having a hard time watching everyone around you getting married, traveling to exotic places or getting promoted – while you are sitting on the couch of your 1 bedroom apartment eating cup o noodles – instead of feeling sorry for your present self, think of your future self, let’s say in 5 years. What would the future YOU tell your present YOU? Exactly! It would tell you TO START. Your current situation is nothing but your starting point. There is no reason and no use in judging yourself or wasting valuable energy on putting yourself down, when all you need to do it take the first steps in the right direction. Envying other people’s success without taking action towards your own goals is like disrespecting your future self. And you deserve better.

Ultimate inspiration

No matter who you envy, instead of feeling bad about yourself for not being as educated, fit or rich as they are (or seem to be), you should thank those people. These feelings of envy and jealousy can be a great motivator for you if you know how to interpret them, since they will show you exactly what you want in life and provide you with the inspiration to take the first steps towards your own success. 

#goals and baby steps

Set goals and write them down. I don’t mean goals as in whatever your parents expectations were for you or what you think others would like to see you do or whatever goals sound good to have. Instead figure out exactly what it is that YOU want and need to be happy, and don’t be ashamed to be brutally honest here. This is your life and no one else can live it for you. Once you can articulate your goals, e.g. I want to lose 15 lbs and run a marathon, you start taking baby steps each and every day towards this specific goal. 

Rise by lifting others – but sincerely

If you are fascinated and inspired by someone’s achievements and follow them on Instagram or in real life, let them know! And I don’t mean the fake kind of praise that I am seeing lately, everyone can easily spot a fake supporter from a real one and it just leaves a bad taste in your mouth, I know you know what I am talking about ;). By congratulating others on their success in an area you wish to succeed in, you are putting your own goals out there in the universe, which helps you stay focused and holds you accountable. Coupled with positive energy from making someone else smile and maybe even gaining a supporter for your own journey, you are on the best road to success.

It’s all fun and games…

I know this is not news, but sometimes it’s good to point out the obvious. Most of what you see on Social Media is produced and edited and does not display real life. Take my own Instagram feed for example. I use my account to promote my blog and (hopefully) inspire you guys to be positive, healthy and live life to the fullest! That has always been my passion and I am thankful for a platform like this since I truly believe it can change lives if consumed correctly. That said, you probably won’t see me post pictures of my baby throwing tantrums at Target or me picking up my dog’s poop. People usually use platforms like IG and Snapchat to promote themselves, their brand, their business to generate growth. Growth in social status, influence, profit. They want you to know how happy their children, how fast their cars, and how lavish their vacations are. Everything that does not serve the purpose of marketing is usually being left out. Of course there are many people who post very real content, however those are not the topic of this blogpost since they might not generate as much jealousy in others. If you scroll through your IG feed next time, remind yourself how much staging and postproduction goes into those images and know that behind those perfect lives there are normal moms, students, shift workers that happen to be passionate about creating beautiful content.


Love yourself always,

Sarah Vanessa